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Forgiveness: Forgiving Others

Dear Queen,

The Bible is crystal clear on the subject of forgiving others. But why is it so important, and how do you and I get the strength to forgive? Harbouring hurt feelings towards others is unhealthy; it does you no good! The truth is, unforgiveness just might kill you faster than Corona, Ebola or Cancer. Have you ever had experiences where harbouring hurt feelings in your heart causes you to have headaches and other pain in the body? I have, and those headaches didn’t go until I released those feelings.

Why does God ask us to forgive? Simply put, we are called to forgive others because God has forgiven us of our sins; he who shows mercy to men receives mercy from God. I know that forgiving the other is important but sometimes it can be really difficult to do. In some cases, it’s a process that really takes time, especially when what you have experienced was very traumatic and you can’t seem to forget.

Maybe your parents did not give you the love that you deserved. They did not support your gifts or your dreams. They may have withheld the love you needed. Maybe your spouse never seems to see things from your viewpoint. They only think of how life affects them. They act selfishly towards you.  Maybe your family members who were supposed to love and care for you when you were a child ended up being the ones inflicting the abuse. Some of these things can be really hard to forgive and they may take weeks, months or even years to get over. But forgiveness is possible!

Our Great High Priest is our perfect example. I don’t think anyone could have suffered more unrighteously than Jesus Christ. Some of His last words were: “Father forgive them, they know not what they do.” Is it easy? No. Is it impossible? “All things are possible to him who believes,” said Jesus. (Mark 9:23) When you don’t have the power or you know that it is not in you to forgive, then you have to find it in Christ. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:12-13) Does forgiving negate the pain you have suffered? Does it reverse the things that have happened to you? Does it mean the person who wronged you doesn’t have to take responsibility for his/her actions? No, but you will be free from the thoughts of hatred and bitterness and the burden they bring. Forgiveness is not only done for the sake of the one you are forgiving, but for your own sake so that you don’t have to live with the burden.

Today, here is my challenge to you: For every single person you are struggling to forgive, for whatever reason, I want you to write those names down and go before the Lord in prayer. Talk to Jesus about your struggle and ask Him to give you the grace needed to release them. One by one you will release those persons. At the end of the day, the feeling or the memory may not leave but for every time you remember what has been done to you, start the process all over again until you have truly released that person. If you are still finding this process hard, don’t be afraid to let us know in the comments so that we can pray with and for you. It is time to let unforgiveness go!

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