Fruit of the Spirit: Gentleness

Gentleness is the quality of being kind, tender, or mild-mannered.  In terms of the fruit of the Spirit, the kind of gentleness we’re interested in involves showing humility and thankfulness towards God, as well as polite, restrained and compassionate behaviour towards everyone else.

Gentleness is a gift of the Spirit, but as a trait, it is produced when we abide in Jesus. It may be a gift, but true gentleness also demands intention on our part.  Meaning, being intentionally kind, compassionate, and humble towards others.

One of the things I want us to do in this season and every season to come is to be intentional about being gentle with our words. Words, if not used carefully, can cut deep and cause division in a split second. Colossians 4:6 says, “Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.” Matthew Henry’s commentary says, “Grace is the salt which seasons our discourse, makes it savoury and keeps it from corrupting.” The words that come from our mouths reflect upon us more than any other facet of our lives. When you communicate with others, are your words seasoned? Are they “savoury” to the ears of others? When you speak in a hurtful manner to your family, both physical and spiritual, are those words “seasoned”?

Think of it this way: If you were walking with God in the park and he accidentally spills coffee on your white dress that you were planning to wear to dinner later that day, what kind of speech would be appropriate to use with Him? Say you’re at home, and you do not want to be bothered, but then Jesus calls you and you are really not in the mood to talk, what response would be appropriate here? Your actions, especially your speech, should always be done as if you are carrying on conversations with God; as if you are always in the presence of God.  Words are powerful! As Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue has the power of life and death.” What you say and how you say it matters. Words can hurt, or they can heal. When we choose to be gentle with our words we can soothe angry or bitter feelings and restore broken relationships. Our gentle words show people that they are valued; whether at the moment you agree or disagree with them. “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” – Proverbs 12:18

God is calling you to have the kind of attitude that is gentle when you interact with others. Especially as women, we are being called to cultivate a “gentle and quiet spirit”. Gentleness is a beauty that cannot and will never fade away. Gentleness is a fruit that God wants to produce in us, but we have to let Him. It’s not something we can develop or cultivate on our own; we have to draw on His sufficiency and grace. It’s easy to be gentle when we are around those who we care for, and who care about us in return.   It’s so easy to be gentle with those who we prefer, but to do the same for strangers, or people who hurt us?

Gentleness is the fruit of the Spirit that demands most from us.  It means taking a position where we place ourselves third on the list – putting God and other people before ourselves.  To be honest, this isn’t something that makes me feel all that comfortable – and maybe it doesn’t for you either.  It requires humility and sacrifice, patience and compassion – qualities that we might feel that we lack (even on our best days).  But there’s good news! God is the fruit-giver and He can work the fruit we lack in us.

Respond:

1. In what ways can you be gentler with your words?
2. Who is one person you could use gentle words with, even if you think that this person doesn’t deserve them?
3. Thank God for giving you the ability to be gentle with your words. Even if right now you aren’t gentle with your words, choose to see yourself as God sees you – a new creation!

[arrow_forms id=’2702′]