I have been quiet on here. Yes, I know. But, God has been taking me through a series of lessons. One such lesson is Understanding the Value of Community. I had shared a bit on the Essentials of a Healthy Life here and PEOPLE stood out to me as one of the top essentials.
The Backstory on the Importance of Community
There was a time when I thought I didn’t need people. Persons were in my life but I formed no attachment. They were never important to me. I was as cold as ice when it came to relationships. That accounts a lot for my self-sufficiency. “I will figure out how to do it on my own.” is a common thought that went through my mind when situations came up. Group activities almost always resulted in me functioning on my own, as I found that many persons just were not reliable. With this mindset, I created an island that suited me. I was the Prime Minister, The Governor General and everyone else of importance. It was all about me.
After being saved, I soon realized that I simply could not make it on my own. At first, I realized that I needed God then I noticed that I needed Godly persons around me who not only knew of God but LIVED for God. My selfish, isolated nature had to be broken down by the Holy Spirit and maintained by deliberate daily actions.
How did I get here?
I was always a loner who preferred to enjoy her own company. However, that was because of how I was raised. Books and school were my friends. The rural mindset of my mother didn’t encourage much play time and opportunities to build relationships with others because something was going to happen that she would have to stand the cost for. Don’t ask me to explain because I don’t know. As a child, your default personality is fun and playful. Even if you are an introverted child, every child wants to build relationships and gain friends. So, I functioned in the default setting until my teenage years when life hit. I experienced disappointment by the persons closest to me. The persons who weren’t supposed to leave or hurt you did so you erect an emotional wall to prevent all others from doing the same.
God wants you to have a community
God wants you to have a community of friends who build you up and pour into you. Your community is a significant aspect of your growth in God. The Bible tells us not to forsake coming together as a people to build each other up (Hebrews 10:25). A community is important for your spiritual development and integrity. Understand that God cares so much about your friends that He will go ahead and strategically place the right persons in your life. However, you must decide to love these persons and work with Him to maintain these relationships.
When you are in the process of establishing these community members:
- Understand that you will not be for everyone. Not everyone is meant to be in your community.
- Guard your territory but be open. I am a huge advocate of Taking the Dating Approach to Friendships. The caution approach is the best strategy to implement when establishing any relationship. However, don’t be too cautious that you miss what God is trying to establish. Be open and sensitive to the move of God.
- Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6). Let God lead in all things. Many times we see persons trying to be a part of our community and think that it is the enemy trying to do something because we can’t fathom being friends with this individual. Lean not on your own understanding. You may be welcoming your destiny helper, a prophet or your intercessor. Do all things with God and He will direct the paths in your community.
Be Blessed.
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Amoy is intent on fulfilling God’s will and purpose for her life. She is a celebrity publicist, a proud Jamaican, a writer, an international speaker, a media practitioner and a published author. She loves all things luxury and is on a mission to become one of the wealthiest women from her island and in the world. 40 under 40, is that you?