Many of you have heard by now that I am engaged to be married. If you didn’t know, now you know. In my true Anointed Writer fashion, I had to share my thoughts and experiences with my readers. I have been sharing a bit on my Social Media pages (Facebook & Instagram). Trust me, a lot goes on over there. You should follow me.
I shared recently about a divine reminder I received that outlined how I had been praying for my now fiance aka future husband before I met him. The responses were overwhelming (the good kind) so, as part of the Woman or Wife Series, I decided to share these steps with you, Queens.
Disclaimer
Before I go into the specific steps, I want you to know that not every woman is ready for marriage and that is okay. Don’t be pressured by your age or society’s expectations of you. This recent blog post goes into more detail on the readiness of the woman for marriage. The MARRIAGE is far more important than the wedding day so walk slowly and carefully to the altar. Grab your notebooks of choice, get a pen and let’s go.
Step One – Pre Prayer
I call step one the preparation step. Please note that the moment you begin to actively pray for your future spouse, you are activating and setting the ball in motion. So, before you begin to actively pray for your future spouse, do a self-check. Ask yourself these questions:
- How is my relationship with God?
- What is my purpose?
- Do I value a relationship more than the will of God for my life?
- Am I functioning in the will of God?
- Am I whole? (e.g. Healed from past emotional hurts)
- Am I free? (e.g. from soul ties and emotional baggage)
- Am I confident?
Once issues are present, actively work on being the best you. Many persons misunderstand this stage. They believe that they are on the journey to be the perfect woman for the man. When, in fact, the woman is being the best version of herself in order to glorify and honour God through her relationship.
Step Two – The LIST
Step two is very important. This step requires a deep relationship with God. You must be submitted to Him and able to trust His guidance and directives. Before I continue, let me admit that I cannot take credit for this process of Praying for my future spouse. Recently, I spoke briefly about how this process began in my life in the most read post on The Anointed Writer. One important point to note about making this list and the process of praying overall is that it is quite the selfless act. It has nothing to do with you and everything about what God wants for you. The list has two components. It covers the areas of your future husband’s life that you will be praying for, as well as the Godly characteristics you need in a spouse.
The List Part One – Prayer Points
It is important to note the areas of focus for prayer. These prayer points will guide how you pray. Pray for/that:
- His heart that it is lost in God
- He will be a God-lover
- Patience
- Understanding
- Trust
- Loyalty and Faithfulness
- Strength
- Protection
- Intimacy
- The List of Characteristics
- Contentment
- Commitment
The List Part Two – Godly Characteristics
This process made me realize something about myself that was too important a detail to miss. It made me realize that what I thought I needed in a man; let alone a husband was quite shallow. Good looks and materialistic items are good but they are not the most important characteristics this man should possess. God quickly revealed to me that Godly traits focus more on the heart and characteristics of the man. My list was so long and detailed but believe me when I tell you that my husband to be is everything I need. For me, he had to be a good listener, he had to be creative and honour God. He also had to be set apart from the things of the world, funny, and charismatic. And, I had to accept the possibility that these Godly traits may not appear in the imagined physical package.
Step Three – Time to Pray
This is the most interesting aspect of the journey in my opinion. Here is where it gets complex. Please be open. Understand that this is a sacred, and spiritual process. Pray in the spirit always. Allow God to give you the words from his heart. Don’t be alarmed by some of the truths that may be uncovered. The process of praying for your future spouse requires much transparency with God. You must be able to face what you see and welcome the necessary changes you will need to make in your own life. Be open to the information that will be given to you through these prayers. You will receive clues and hints that will help you identify this spouse when he arrives. Handle your information with care. Note that it is not for everyone.
Prayer is the information process that lets you know when to get ready and when to look up. This process requires faith and obedience. It requires selflessness and honour. Many see this as an easy process but it will STRETCH you and ensure that you’re not only praying for but preparing for him as well.
Are you ready?
Let us pray.
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Amoy is intent on fulfilling God’s will and purpose for her life. She is a celebrity publicist, a proud Jamaican, a writer, an international speaker, a media practitioner and a published author. She loves all things luxury and is on a mission to become one of the wealthiest women from her island and in the world. 40 under 40, is that you?